Confident People Don’t Masturbate

Just as we can think of depression through the NoFap perspective, we can do the same with confidence.

This article is going to serve as an overview of what happens to your confidence levels while on NoFap, and on the other related topics of this field – including self-esteem, personal image, and the id & superego.

In psychology, everything is related, and improving your confidence cannot happen in a vacuum.

The more you work on your confidence, the more you’ll improve in other areas of life.

The Primary Cause of Low Confidence

If you try to look up a list of potential causes of low confidence and self-esteem issues, you’ll likely find hundreds of different causes, but all of them are going to be vague, ambiguous and most probably not all that tailored to your specific problem.

The problem is that no one is willing to tackle the main problem that causes low self-esteem in people: lack of competency.

You cannot just “magically” make yourself believe that you are capable and confident in doing something, without actually being able to produce a certain degree of competency. Low confidence is in many cases actually warranted.

If you are afraid of talking to girls, of escalating in dates, then most probably you feel (and probably are) not skilled enough for that task. Yes, there is no objective measure of “skillfulness” when it comes to social activities, but what matters is the level of skill you think you need to have.

Your mind is constantly comparing A to B – i.e., how much you know something, and how much you would like to know something.

There are Only 2 Ways to Boost Your Confidence:

Lower your anxiety with NoFap

When I wrote that you are comparing A to B, A is a variable that can change depending on your anxiety levels.

Anxiety is a fear of the future. The more fearful you are = the more anxious you are.

Engaging in PMO activities and living a secluded lifestyle is linked to increased levels of social anxiety.

Not masturbating and going out on a frequent basis with real, live people is going to do wonders for your anxiety & social fear levels. In most cases, in less than a month, you are going to feel like you need a lot less skill in order to be socially competent.

Staying alone at your place, playing games and binge-watching TV shows is distancing you from the objective reality. It makes you live in a world that doesn’t exist. Being social is going to “equalize” the reality of the world that is happening around you, and the one you’ve constructed in your mind.

Eliminate procrastination and be driven towards learning new skills

The other option (apart from lowering your social anxiety), is to actually gain real, raw competence.

If you are a masterful coder, you are never going to feel anxiety about your skill. The same goes for all the other types of confidence.

There are Multiple Types of Confidence

“Confidence” is not a one-dimensional entity.

You can have confidence in your work skills, but lack confidence in the social sphere (a common combo I might say).

The only way to gain confidence, and that means skill, is to eliminate procrastination and learn new skills.

As you might already know, watching pornography and engaging in masturbation is an instant motivation killer. There are no unambitious people – there are just people that have reached sexual exhaustion due to living a sexually unsustainable lifestyle.

After 90 days of NoFap work, you are going to feel like a new person You are going to easily attract the opposite sex. You will have no more PIED.

You won’t have to write to-do lists in order to keep a schedule – you will feel a burning desire in your heart to accomplish your daily tasks.

That’s why I recommend that you do NoFap on hard mode and never look back.

You will simultaneously accomplish both things that can boost your self-confidence levels: you will lower your anxiety, and you will become masterful at the things that you enjoy doing.

NoFap Confidence Questions and Answers:

Can NoFap Really Boost Confidence?

NoFap is one of the best confidence boosters in existence.

Not only can NoFap increase your confidence levels, but it can also lessen the symptoms of anxiety and depression.

Anything that can increase your competitive drive is going to be psychologically beneficial.

And to answer the follow-up question: yes, being competitive is a very useful trait for dating.

Women love competitive guys, and NoFap can help you become one.

When Can NoFap Increase my Confidence?

The amount of time needed on NoFap to increase your confidence varies from person to person, and it is influenced by several factors.

You’ll be most likely to get an increase in your confidence levels after you pass the flatline. That’s roughly the time when the early negative symptoms of quitting your pornography addiction are going to subside, and the effect of the positive symptoms (such as confidence and self-esteem) are going to increase.

Why do I Feel a Sudden Burst of Confidence While Doing NoFap?

It is normal for some days to feel a sudden burst of confidence, only to find that the effects of this type of confidence are short-lived.

You have to understand that porn and masturbation have prevented you from feeling your inner drive and personal ambition for a long time. Now, since you have freed yourself from the shackles of pornography, you’re going to need a period of readjustment.

It is normal to feel different ups and downs during this period.

Confidence is such an aspect that can fluctuate on a daily basis. Even people that haven’t been through a pornography addiction can have fluctuating self-esteem levels. That’s a normal thing.

In psychology, self-esteem and confidence are subjective measures of reality, and different people have different sensitivity levels. Meaning what can affect you may not affect others.

For some people, any environmental factor can influence their confidence. Even minor stressful events at school or work could make them feel bad.

The key to solving your confidence issues is to take it one step at a time and keep focusing on the big picture.

It doesn’t matter how you feel today or tomorrow.

What matters is that you need to build a foundation of confidence, one that can allow you to ease through any problems in life.

Confidence only matters when things get tough, and it’s only at that point when you can truly know whether you are confident or not.

Most of you reading this are already pretty confident – that’s why you can do something like NoFap, whilst others care only about getting their daily dose of stimulation.

Can NoFap Also Boost Social Confidence?

This is an excellent question, and the answer is that yes, NoFap is an awesome tool to increase social confidence.

Social confidence isn’t that different from regular confidence since these two types of confidence are intervened. You can’t boost your social confidence without also influencing your general confidence levels.

So, to summarize, since NoFap can increase your overall confidence levels, that means that your social confidence is going to increase as well.

There is a dedicated article here about confidence and social anxiety available here.

Can I Lose the Confidence I’ve Gained on NoFap?

Unless you relapse for a long period of time, there is no risk for losing the confidence you’ve gained while doing NoFap.

The reason you feel better after doing NoFap is because you have started to feel the inner confidence that was always present in you. Masturbation and pornography simply masked its effect.

There might be some psychological reasons as well. It is possible that the mere act of watching other people have sex and/or masturbating can send signals to your subconscious mind that you are not sexually worthy, and that can lower your confidence.

Think about it – watching porn is being a voyeur. There is nothing dominant, confident or cool about being a voyeur. Watching others being sexual is a low-level, anti-masculine behavior.

On the flipside though – not masturbating can have the opposite effect – it can send signals throughout your body that you need to become more confident and aggressive in order to find a suitable mate.

Why do I Still Don’t Have Confidence While Doing NoFap?

First of all, don’t worry – not having confidence (yet) doesn’t mean NoFap isn’t working for you.

Confidence is not something that you can be incapable of having. You cannot “lose” confidence.

It’s just that for some guys, a longer period of readjustment is going to be needed.

Younger generations tend to fall into the pornography trap much sooner than previous generations, meaning pornography can leave lasting scars on their psyche. Being scared this way doesn’t mean you can’t cure yourself of the negative side-effects of pornography. It just means that you are going to need more time.

Stay strong, don’t relapse, and you’ll get your confidence back. That’s a promise.

Is There a Link Between Dopamine and Confidence?

Yes, there is a link between dopamine levels and confidence.

Dopamine is the so-called “anticipation chemical,” since it is often released before we do some action that we think it’s going to be beneficial.

That’s why gamblers stay addicted to gambling – it’s not the rewards that hook them in – it’s the intermittent anticipation of an incoming reward.

The link between dopamine and confidence is not as clear, but here is what we can logically conclude:

High dopamine levels are usually present in people with addictions. People with addictions are not high functioning individuals, therefore we can conclude that no matter whether they display (outward) high confidence levels, people that have artificially high dopamine levels do not have inner confidence.

Inner confidence takes time and dedication in order to cultivate. That means going through periods of low dopamine levels.

Evolutionary speaking, dopamine is something that is supposed to motivate us just several times throughout the day. It’s supposed to force us to find food to eat, a mate with whom to procreate, hoard items which can be useful.

Dopamine is not something that you should be overflowing with for hours at a time.

Is Being Calm a Type of Confidence?

Yes, calmness is linked to feelings of confidence.

If you look at all the idealized masculine characters in old movies, you’ll notice that they all talk slowly and have high-effort,  dedicated movements while not showing signs of excitability.

The opposite of being calm – laughing all the time, being excitable and vulnerable are feminine characteristics.

Too many guys try to imitate characters from video games, to the detriment of their dating success.

Will Relapsing Destroy my Confidence?

“Destroy” is too much of a strong word in this situation.

Yes, relapsing can lower your confidence and can put you in risk of losing your “nofap gains.” However for that to occur, you need to heavily relapse for a long period of time. We’re talking about masturbating 3+ times per day, for weeks on end.

What is the Timeline for NoFap Confidence?

The short & basic NoFap confidence timeline would be something like this:

The first signs of your improved confidence can appear within a short period of time – quicker than most other NoFap benefits. Some guys can expect to notice an improvement in their social behavior and success after just two weeks.

Most are going to feel the full effects of their improved confidence within 30-45 days.